Category: celebrate

An Accomplished Young Adult with Autism

Mike with Nick at Senior Night

As the football season comes to a close, so does the marching band season.  Tis bittersweet for Nicholas, as he loves the camaraderie of the marching band. However, we have a reprieve!  The football team is in the playoffs, so the marching band continues to perform.

A few weeks ago, the marching band celebrated senior night.  My husband and I escorted Nick in front of the football stands during halftime.  As we walked, the announcer voiced Nick’s goals after high school–to study music and math.  Nick beamed.  He gave me a rose and a big hug.

Before giving roses to moms

I cherish these moments. Memories of his challenges as a youngster with autism are never far from me. Memories of Nick struggling with loud noises, and now playing in a marching band. Memories of Nick trying to express himself in words, and now expressing himself musically. Memories of Nick overcoming so many issues…  Nick is now emerging as an accomplished young man with autism.

This is a moment to celebrate in the life of Nick!

Ryan WON!!

Ryan won his first tennis match yesterday.  It was also the first win for his team for the season.  YEA.

I am bummed that I missed it.  With the last minute schedule change, I couldn’t watch any of the match.  However, Gramma made it.  She told me via text about the win.  I was very excited.

Then came some strange news from Gramma.

It wasn’t Ryan who told her about the victory.  It was Nick.  Nick was ecstatic, and was sharing the news with great enthusiasm.  Ryan was quiet.

When we all arrived at home from our various activities, I asked Ryan about the win.  He acknowledged that he won.  That was it.  Nick gave a few details, again with enthusiasm.

I told Ryan that we don’t need to celebrate.  He seemed ok with that.  I thought that would get a big reaction, like a “Why not?”  Nick did ask, though.

Then I explained.  If Ryan is not happy about his win, then neither are we.  Ryan didn’t like that.  He tried to suppress a smile.  I immediately told him to smile.  “DO smile.  It is worth celebrating. This is BIG.”  Again, he tried to suppress a smile.

I ended up showing him a picture of him when he was quite young.  He had a happy face, a big smile.  He was genuinely happy.  I said, “That is you smiling.  That is you happy. It’s ok to show it.”

He dared a small smile.

I told myself–baby steps.  He needs baby steps.  I don’t understand why he doesn’t want to smile or talk about his win.  But he does need to know it’s ok to smile.

O Happy Day!

Ryan about to serve

In the midst of trying to resolve issues, there is a bright light.  AND did we celebrate.

Ryan and Nick played in their first tennis match on their high school tennis team.  Ryan tried cross country, but the endurance was too much.  I bet the desert heat didn’t help during the summer either.  Nick did track and field in junior high, but his heart belonged to an event that he didn’t get to do.

Mike and I have introduced various sports in the past.  Some were too expensive to continue.  Others just didn’t capture the boys’ interest.  So why tennis?

Nick returning a serve

My parents have played tennis for as long as I can remember.  I tried playing, but I spent more time running after the balls that went over the fence than playing on any court.  The boys had a few lessons from their grandparents when the boys were very little.  What made it stick this time?  I don’t know.  I don’t underestimate that the girls’ team might have some influence.  The girls and boys’ tennis teams practice at the same time.  Hmmm.

What I do know is this is a HUGE milestone for the boys.  Many years ago, the boys had several issues to overcome.  Nick couldn’t stand to wear socks, let alone shoes.  As they developed autism, their gait became abnormal.  Walking and running were dangerous.  They lost their balance easily.  Ryan ran with his eyes closed.  I was told this was a sensory issue.

Ryan serving, Nick at the net

I became a soccer mom of therapy.  Days on end of traveling from school to therapies–physical and occupational therapies (among other therapies).  I made sure they had adaptive PE in school.  Years of therapy.  Miles of driving.  With no guarantee of improvement.  Just hope.

Today is hope fulfilled.

Coach W with Nick

Ryan and Nick played in a real sport at school. Their matches were even next to each other on the court. They played in the singles and doubles.  They were actually the doubles team.  The coach guided them at times.  Otherwise, they played.  On their own.

Those years of therapies have paid off.  My boys may have a hobby for life!  Priceless.